The Idol of Routine and the Illusion of Control
by Amanda Christopher
I have long been a fan of routine, knowing what to expect from day to day. To some degree, that’s ok, even healthy, but what happens when that routine is blown to pieces? My response tells me whether my relationship with routine has been a healthy one or not.
At the beginning of this year, I had a great routine. Two kids in school, one in mother’s morning out. I had a 6-week meal plan and a grocery pick up scheduled every Sunday. My planner was full and kept me on track. I knew, more or less, what each week held for me.
Then, along comes March and a pandemic. Schools closed. My job comes to almost a complete halt. I can’t get a grocery pick up scheduled, and grocery stores don’t even have the things I need half the time. My routine is gone. And things got ugly.
(Now, I’m not saying it is wrong to struggle when everything seems to go sideways. These last couple of months have been HARD. But my response taught me something.)
When I say things got ugly, I mean there were days I had no patience for my kids and husband. I was angry, easily frustrated and overwhelmed. Finally one day it was all too much, and as soon as my husband got home from work, I left and went for a walk at a nearby park.
As I walked and prayed, God began to convict me that my routine had become an idol, something I believed I couldn’t function without. The loss of my routine and my subsequent sin toward my family showed that I valued my own convenience and expectations above them and their hearts.
And why? Why was my routine so important? Because it made me believe I was in control. With my planner and schedule, I could manage my own life, know what to expect, and keep things neat and easy. But I was never actually in control; that was an illusion. And coming face to face with that messed me up.
My peace and joy came from my routine. Because I believed I was in control, my ability to do everything as unto the Lord hinged on everything going my way. So what is the answer? What is the comfort when that idol of routine fails, and the illusion of control is revealed for what it truly is?
The much better truth is that God is in control; he is the stronghold of my life (Psalm 27:1).
He is good and merciful (Psalm 145:9).
He loves me with an unshakeable love (Romans 8:38-39).
He gives me peace (John 14:27).
He has good plans for me (Jer. 1:5).
He will equip me to do what He has called me to (Heb. 13:20-21).
I am not controlled by my circumstances. Jesus came and lived the perfect life, died for my sins, rose again and gave his Holy Spirit to all who believe. The same Spirit who raised Him from the dead is in me. If He can raise Jesus from the grave, surely he can give me peace, joy, and the ability to live my life in a way that brings honor to God, even when things seem to be spiraling out of control.
What a gift the Spirit is to us! I pray that as we continue through uncertain times, we are Spirit-led people, who point those around us to the source of true joy and peace. Not routine or control, not a sense of normalcy, but Jesus.