Starting to believe again
The circumstances have changed very little - the same stressors are there - they haven't miraculously disappeared... in fact there may have been a few added. Yet there is change. The day is new. The image that keeps popping into my head is that of the bright morning sun streaming into a bedroom under the narrow slit uncovered by a window shade... such a narrow slit but such bright light. My belief is small right now - a narrow slit - but I feel today like that sunlight is beginning to stream in and fill the darkness room.
Your prayers for me, my prayers for Jesus, remembering his promises and reminding myself again of how faithful he has always been has raised the shade enough to let the light stream in. The shade isn't up yet - mind you - I am not ready to shout that I'm all in - but its beginning... my faith is coming back and I am starting to believe again... to believe that I am His, to believe that I am loved, to believe that I am cared for... to believe that not only is he with me in the midst of struggle, but so is the family that I am now a part of. i am beginning to believe again that if he would give up his own son for me in love, how would he not care for me in this, and this, and this, and this. I am starting to believe again the good news as I see again the place and the proof of his love and care and provision and so much more... I see it all most clearly in the cross of Christ... where all of the promises of God find their YES.