Let Them See You Love Jesus
by Amanda Christopher
We have a Kids’ Resource Shelf in the lobby, to provide parents with books and other tools for discipling their kids. Those resources have been very well received, and I have loved seeing parents grab books from those shelves! However, there is something I have been thinking about since we introduced those shelves, and it is this: reading books about Jesus to your kids, teaching them theology, reading parenting books - all of those things are important. But just as important, if not more, is letting your kids see you love and follow Jesus.
In the same way that we can read Christian books, study theology, memorize Scripture and still lack personal relationship with Jesus, we can do all those things with our kids and still not model a life of devotion to Him. What I want is for the resources we provide to help parents have meaningful conversations with their kids about God and the gospel, to bring really big ideas into a simple framework for kids to understand, and to aid parents in training their children to view all of life through the lens of the gospel.
What I don’t want is for these books, conversation cards, videos, etc, to become a way to outsource teaching our kids about things we don’t know and aren’t really believing or living ourselves. What I don’t want is for parents to go all day without mentioning Jesus to their kids, then read a book about Him before bed, say prayers, and mentally check off the “Disciple my kids” box in their heads.
Several weeks ago, an old knee injury had suddenly started causing significant discomfort, and I was about to leave home to go do something that required a lot of movement. I have a brace that helps, but I couldn’t find it. I searched all over, then sat on my bed and prayed aloud, “God, you know where my brace is, and you know I need it. Please make it known to me.”
My oldest daughter heard me praying and when she asked what I was doing, I explained. A few minutes later, she found my brace! This prompted a conversation with her that God cares about even the smallest things in our lives; He hears us when we cry out to Him; and He even uses us to answer other people’s prayers.
This knee brace was not a big deal, really, but my daughter heard me asking God for help in my moment of need, and she was a part of His answer. I could’ve prayed silently, but for some reason that day I didn’t. And since that happened, I have been purposefully praying out loud, especially when I am crying out to Jesus for help.
That is just one story. When I say “Let your kids see you love and follow Jesus,” here’s what I mean.
Let them see you studying your Bible. Prioritize your time with the Lord and in His Word. When your children interrupt you, explain to them how important it is for you to read your Bible to know who God is, what He has done, and what that means for us. We can’t grow in love for someone we do not know.
Let them hear you repenting of your sin to our merciful heavenly Father and asking for forgiveness. Then remind them of the gospel- because of what Jesus has done, all our sins- past, present, future- are forgiven and paid for!
Let them see you serve. When you serve, tell them what you’re doing and why. I sing at church. My daughter doesn’t like that I’m gone all morning when I sing, but I tell her that it is a gift God has given me, and we are called to use our gifts for His glory and the good of His body, the church, and this is a way I show my love for Jesus and His people.
If you’re in a DNA group, or if your spouse is, when mom or dad leaves for a DNA meeting, tell them what it’s about and why it matters.
Let them see you worship through singing. Music moves us in a particular way, there is no doubt. It moves our children too. Let them see you loving Jesus through your heartfelt, joyful singing.
Share a personal belief struggle (whenever appropriate) with your kids and how the gospel applies to that struggle. As an example, we are in the middle of selling our house and buying another. That whole process is a LOT, and I’ve been overwhelmed at times. I’ve told my kids how sometimes it’s hard for me to believe that God will take care of us, but I know He will because of the gospel! God has already met our greatest need in sending Jesus for us, so why would He not meet every lesser need?
My work often requires that I leave my family in the evening hours. I talk with my kids about my job, and that it is helping to grow God’s kingdom, so when they give me up for an evening, they are my little partners in God’s mission.
Talk with your kids regularly about the gospel and what it is. This starts with you telling them. Tell them often. Then ask them, what is the gospel? Give hints, let them fill in blanks, tell the story together. It is good for them, and you, to rehearse the details of the gospel, to remember what God has done, and to be prepared when we have the opportunity to share! (If you’d like help knowing how to communicate the gospel to different ages, let me know! I am happy to talk with you and there will be no judgment!)
There are so many ways to model for your children this life of following Jesus. It’s not a formula! But to model it, you must actually actively and intentionally love and follow Jesus. You can teach your kids facts, but seeing you live out a personal, meaningful, life-changing relationship with Jesus is what will impact your children the most.
If this seems scary, don’t be afraid. You are the parent God has given to your children. He will give you what you need to lead them in the ways of Jesus.