Can I Ever Change?
One of our kids has really been struggling lately with sin. This child has had a really hard time being obedient, respectful and kind. After a stern conversation recently, he came to me and said, “Mom, do you want me to make better choices?”
I said, “Yes, I do. But more than that, I want you to love Jesus. When you love and trust in Jesus, he gives you the Holy Spirit, and he will help you know when you’re doing the wrong thing and what you should do instead.” We prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to help us both.
This was a good reminder to me, and I’m sure it came from the Holy Spirit himself, that no matter how much I train and discipline my children, their deepest need is true heart change. I can put rules and consequences in place, I can yell, redirect, and require obedience, and at the end of the day, without the gospel and the work of the Holy Spirit, all I’ve accomplished is behavior modification.
This is just as true for me as it is for my children. Sometimes I become discouraged and wonder if I can ever change. I still struggle with many of the same sins I struggled with ten years ago. Why haven’t I grown past those yet?
One thing we know is true: It is possible for believers to resist the temptation to sin. We are not helpless in the fight against sin. Jesus’ life, death and resurrection overcame the power of sin in our lives, so we are no longer slaves to sin, but slaves to righteousness.
So if I am still struggling with the same sins and seem to be at a standstill in my personal spiritual growth, it is likely that I am trying to change myself rather than trusting in the Holy Spirit and the transforming power of the gospel for my sanctification. (I do think there are some sins we are more prone to on an individual level because of our personalities, and maybe some of those we will struggle with our whole lives. We should struggle with them less and less as we become more like Jesus, but we will not become perfect in this life.)
We are prone to the misbelief Jesus saves us, but we must sanctify ourselves. We think with enough discipline and determination, we can overcome our sinful desires and tendencies. And maybe we can, for a time. But eventually our own attempts will fail, because our hearts aren’t being transformed, just our behaviors. We have left the gospel completely out of the equation.
Praise the Lord that even when we forget the gospel, God doesn’t leave us there. Just like I told my son, the Holy Spirit is God in me, convicting me, reminding me of what is true, and helping me to know and do what God has commanded. If you are a follower of Christ, he does the same for you. The same Spirit who raised Jesus from the dead is in us. Just as he gave life to Jesus’ dead body, he has given life to our dead hearts.
This is not to say we have no role in our sanctification. Paul often uses phrases like, “press on toward the goal,” “run the race,” or “fight the fight.” There is clearly work for us to do, and it does take discipline on our part. It will often include some practical steps to remove temptations from our lives and pursue holiness. But our efforts in our growth are done in cooperation with the work that the Holy Spirit is doing in us. We are not on our own.
So, yes! We can change! Not only that, we must change. When we gaze on Christ and his glory and beauty, we will be changed. When we are moved by his great love for us, shown throughout Scripture and most clearly on the cross, we strive to obey, to live righteous, holy lives that point to the treasure that Christ is, remembering that the Holy Spirit is continually at work in us. May we be humbled and awed by his beautiful plan of redemption!
Now the Lord is the Spirit and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.
2 Corinthians 3:17-18