Can I Ask You All My Questions?

by Joy Walter

There is a dichotomy in life that is difficult to understand sometimes, a pendulum of emotions that can take us from joy to pain in a moment or even simultaneously. This paradox creates questions that often don't have answers and causes a whole range of emotions. That is why I love the Psalms so much. David asks the same questions I do. 

“Why, O LORD, do you stand far away? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Psalm 10:1) 

“How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I take counsel in my soul and have sorrow in my heart all the day?” (Psalm 13:1-2)

My heart resounds with the lyrics of this song by Bethany Barnard: 

“Keep me, O God. I know I can’t keep myself. 
One minute, angry with You. The next, begging for Your help. 
My comfort, Jeremiah. My mantra, words of Job. 
My brother, shepherd David—they always make me feel at home…
I’m with Mary and Martha, You showed up a little late. 
Can I ask You all my questions? 
Will my doubt scare You away?” 

The final verse of this song answers with the truth of the Gospel: 

“I see You in the garden sweating drops of blood. 
Your suffering before You, ‘Not My will but Yours be done.’ 
You have done it for me. I just get to put it on. 
I don’t have to do this perfectly. You help me with my cross.
Jesus, You promised those You’ve been given You’ll keep a hold on with no conditions. 
Here in this desert is my oasis, a table prepared, a feast of Your faithfulness.”

Honest Questions

In the past two weeks, I have rejoiced as a friend experienced an immediate and complete miraculous healing after almost a year of excruciating pain and confusion. During the same time, I have mourned as another friend completed his cancer battle, leaving his young wife a widow and his baby fatherless. The healing for these two looked very different. What do I do with this conflict of emotions? 

In just the past few days, I have sat by the deathbed of two different individuals—one who lived a full life leaving a legacy of faith to her children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren; the other whose life seemed snuffed short. Surely, he had so much more life to live? The dichotomy of life—rejoicing and sorrow, healing and pain, life and death. Where do I go with this roller coaster of emotions? The Psalms. 

Who can relate to these feelings? David. He understood these emotions and these questions. I think we could have been friends. Even more so, Jesus knows. Jesus understands. Jesus, the hero of David’s Psalms. He is my friend in both my sorrow and my rejoicing. David may start so many Psalms with questions and fears, but he ends them with the truth he knows. 

“But you do see…O LORD, you hear the desire of the afflicted; you will strengthen their heart; you will incline your ear…” (Psalm 10:14a, 17) 

“But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, because he has dealt bountifully with me.” (Psalm 13:5-6)

One of the things I love about the Psalms is the evidence that David isn’t just trying on his own to overcome his feelings of doubt and abandonment. It is clear that the Lord’s presence is near to him as he pours out his fears and questions. Another song of Bethany’s describes it well:

“But You, Son of Man, Love incarnate, You don’t see from far away. 
You come, sit with me, and grieve with me. And I see tears on Your face. 
I’ve gotta reconcile that You don’t fast forward me through this. 
And I’ve gotta reconcile that You want to know me when I’m like this. 
And I’ve gotta reconcile that You didn’t change the diagnosis. 
And I’ve gotta reconcile that You’ve reconciled it all in Your flesh.” 

Just like with David, the Lord comes and sits with us in our sorrow ever so gently reminding us of the truth—He will never leave us, and He died and rose again so that we have ultimate victory in Him, though the journey may be long and hard. 

What about those moments in life that surprise us? Those sudden things that take our breath away. Those times when rejoicing comes naturally. Like after a year of pain and questions when He comes with sudden and unexpected healing. The Psalms are there then too. 

“I will extol You, O LORD, for you have drawn me up and have not let my foes rejoice over me. O LORD my God, I cried to you for help, and you have healed me…Sing praises to the LORD, O you his saints, and give thanks to his holy name. For his anger is but for a moment, and his favor is for a lifetime. Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes in the morning.” (Psalm 30:1-2, 4-5)

For those who put their faith in Christ, the Psalms offer comfort for the whole spectrum of human emotions. Because of the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus, we can come into the presence of the Lord and bare our souls. He has bridged the gap, forever inviting us into the intimate fellowship with God we were created for. Like David, we can cry out to God because we know He is our Father.

So, whether you are on the mountaintop or in the valley, you can cry out in the full expression of human emotion found in the Psalms. If your heart is hurting, you can come like David in your honesty to the Lord with all your questions and pain. As you do, His gentle Spirit will sit with you in your sorrow and then remind you of what is true. If you are bursting with excitement and joy, you can join David in singing praises and giving thanks from the overflow of your heart.